. Now, Im really ready to move on because I know hes a bad record to my dad now and I cant bring him back to the house anymore. Just dont know when. Many of us have been in relationships before with someone who might have become possessive and the hint of that early on can and will scare us off. So i think this is the best response i can offer. You may walk around with this pain for a while, maybe your whole life, but almost everyone nurses hurts from their pasts that are there but just kind of fade with time. He told me he wants to take me fishing since its his favorite thing too and told me to text him in the morning because he wanted to wake up from a text from me. He later unfriended me and I noticed this but was cool about it as we were not friends, just acquaintances. In many cases, when someone doesnt text you back, it might stir up feelings of fear or worry that the other person has lost interest or is going to leave. He honestly seems genuine but it also seems like a lot of work to be in this relationship if hes going to flake out like this. Dont email him anymore. Im sorry girl, you deserve better. so thanks. i dont want to fall out with him and although i wanted him to carry on chatting to me in a cute romantic manner i would do anything right now to just here a simple hello from him to know i am in good books with him .. thanks. Sign up for ourfree newsletterand get a free chapterof our book,"He's NotThat Complicated". Thats why he always talks to him. lol i miss messages and requests on there all the time and dont see them for weeks sometimes so that was kind of pointless to even put in that post. I dont know if he loves me. . If you make her into more than she is (just a woman), then youll add so much pressure to the situation that youre fears will sabotage everything. Us women take things way to personally and try to read into EVERYTHING! Hope this helps. But I dont know how long I can/should hang on here. I didnt acknowledge I had seen him. But again, the problem is that its not a realistic, sustainable habit to be constantly texting little messages all day. We sometimes are in denial. So why wouldnt anyone else do the same?! I dont want to meet new people since I like him. My advice to guys and girls in this sitch: find a way to hang out with them soon. Im 18, hes 20, and we live in different countries and only see each other every 2 years or so since we were kids. If youre dating a lazy texter ( only texts to make plans, not really anything flirty or random) who admits to being lazy about it, should the girl just go ahead and text him? Hi Ash, thank u for sharing ur thoughts. I think all those are cop outs, I think we are all very desperate women seeking answers and comfort for the bad behavior of the men we care for. We manages to see each other once or every other week out of our busy schedules though I would love to get together more. So if a guy really cared, then texting me shouldnt be an issue, right? Im a girl, but I HATE texting; it feels so impersonal to me. etc. He responded back with Call me to discuss I text him and said I was out of commission for the rest of the day (meaning I had other plans but Ill call him the next day) he then got all paranoid I didnt like him and I was blowing him off, etc and he got the vibe when I didnt respond to his text. ok so ive been talking to this guys for a couple week, he is very sweet and nice and ive never met another like him i want him to be mine so bad but he is so hard to get we would text constantly and he says that he really likes me and that we need to take things slow eariler we was texting and doing just fine, the last thing he said is sorry its raining and i am trying to drive and i texted back ok thats fine after that no text or anything its been like 6 hours now and i dont know whats going on.. i dont know if he is hurt or if he is busy.. it worries me to death, i tried not to blow up his phone and tried to wait on him to text me and tell me everything is ok, but i texted him a couple time asking if he is ok and if something is going on? hoops and fire rings just to try and be with you! I am not ready to be intimate with him at all and going away to a romantic Island with him will probably make him think that if he does his disappearing act again wooing me with gifts or whatever will make me take him back. He doesnt call to say hi or see how Im doing. I just tend to worry sometimes a lot though but I think that Ive found the answers to my worries. Sorry, Im not so desperate to be married/in a relationship that Ill stick around for that. If a guy stopped texting, then I wouldnt text him Until later and I would send a text. And i was pissed. We have been going out for more than a month now. ) get off the ride of your mind. The window of opportunity has already past in that case. It sounds as if you are way too interested in your daughters social life. Ashlyn, you are right. He texted me right up until I put the frosting on the cake, told me hed see me in a few and I never heard from him again until the next morning when he claimed he fell asleep on the couch after taking a shower. He said that he would contact me within the next couple of days. Put on a great podcast, and focus on the walk. i feel for women because i know many of us guys can be pr**ks and some of you are just being used or mistreated, and it has nothing to do with how many times you text. thanks :). Again a day later. Im cool with it. Sometimes YOU JUST KNOW when somethings wrong. He told me last week that may be this week we would me, well, I text him saying hey did you find a day so I knew bc i would be leaving back soon, he didnt reply.. so I left it. Dont judge a relationship merely by texting habits. He texted me on Sunday, and after that, he just disappeared. He apologized for being m.i.a. Never let them be that comfortable with usmake them step up to the plate. Im so mad about it and i dont know what to do!! Plus he goes into his Man cave (only learning about that now, reading the book Men are From Mars, Woman are from Venus). I said that he wasnt and that it was very nice and sweet of him to say that to which he replied good. I replied with a smiley and after a few minutes, I texted him asking him how work was going. When a guy suddenly stops texting right at the beginning of a relationship, it could be for a number of reasons you dont know his patterns yet, so he might be at the gym. Texting a girl who is just a friend everyday is something I wouldnt put up with from a guy Im dating. THANK YOU! :-). Resist the Urge to Keep Texting Him It's been two days and you're dying to reach out to him. I am so glad you showed me you are a flake so early so I didnt waste too much of my time on you. so he said your acting like were dating after such a short time but thats not what i meant , and he said he was turned off by that later on ever since the texting slowed down but he texts me one day and when i respond he responds back or sometimes doesnt and than dissapears for another week , that why people are telling me that hes just doing this now because hes afraid ill turn him in because hes kind of my boss and if i say something he can get fired so is thats whats going on ? In july i found out after i set him up he told me he had sex with one of his ex. Im glad Im not the only one going through this. Big mistake. It really sucks not knowing whats going to happen but its better than regretting things we did in a temporary period of weakness. - Stop assuming that he's not interested in you now. he told me he likes me and then i told him that we can be friends for the mean time, and then after highschool lets see if we can work this out because my parents says so, and after that we got really close by social medias. I called them out. He is young and I know he is probably dating other girls and I wasnt looking for a relationship, only a friendship but he may have interpreted things differently. He has told me twice, once thru text and when I saw him, that just because hes busy and may not text often for me to stop texting him. I feel the same way about closure. It has only been 2 days he might have something else he needs to attend to. Also, does he like me or does he just want a friend to talk to? Now I realise its probably best for both of us to relax for a day or 2. Playing hard to get isn't an honest or authentic way to approach a relationship. Wellyou are so right! . Guys are more sensitive than they care to admit. Help me please :-). I had to pull myself together because I was asking the wrong questions!! But the CHANGE was what concerned me, not the amount of communication, merely the change in communication. This only lasted for a couple days and then all of a sudden our texts became very minimal to the point of no more texts. So, I reluctantly believed him. Plus you wont have to worry because you wont be obsessing over if hes on there while you want him to reply to your text. Whats that all about? Its been two days and Im getting worried whether hes alright or not! If I a guy acts so interested one day and then a few weeks later acts like he doesnt give a rats ass about me, I am going to assume that he really has moved on, and I will too. If he wants to be with you,you wont ever question if he likes you or not. Well he did call the same day I wrote my post after 1 day of silence (thursday). The very next day I get another text asking if I wanted to meet up later that evening. With the social aspect of social media, we might even find it very hard not to feed into the constant drama of it. Found this very interesting, been seeing someone for 5 weeks, he was full on, texting all day long, ringing me in the evening, making the arrangements to meet up, which we only did once a week. I just read about 4 articles, and its like your talking directly at me! This is very helpful! Two days from then I tried to text her, but have had no reply for the past three days. Sooner or later, though, there will be a point where the person youre seeing doesnt text back and youre left wondering what theyre up to. i juz want to know if this signs of a likes me, we always txting exchanging txt from day to night?, sometimes we used eat lunch she will wait for me at 2pm juz to see each other bec i have only 1 hour break because of work.. then we go to THIS place far from out city juz to hang out, we ride into a bus and then wen we r going home were both tired, i tell her to sleep on my shoulders smiling at me, and shes very comfortable,she also ask me to sing =D , maybe 2 hours of riding that bus. Why is he doing this to me? Hes most likely still thinking of you hes just busy doing something else. He's curious about what happened between you two but is too afraid to ask. After that he did text first a few times, and asked me out. We both got tipsy and I ended up at his place and we had sex 5 times ( best sex of my life ). The day after he didnt text me and a few days later I still hadnt got a text so I decided to text him to say hi and he didnt reply. You can rewind a little and hold him to a higher standard now. After that it seemed like I always had to initiate the conversations to get a response. When he doesnt text back hes just not that into you coz how else is he supposed to contact you if hes never called or asked you our yet. Thus, I removed him from Facebook. And if the simple inquiry provokes outra. This article was sooo helpful to me!! Dont go crazy for a guy. We have been texting back and forth for like a month now. Thank you again!!! But it does get exhausting so I have been trying to give him more space. So im married and I have a few friends but we never hang out. I know that I am not supposed to think the worst, but texts are very simple to return. He gives the same reasonstoo busy at workwas napping, I will just let him text me from now onwards..:]. Im a guy and I used to be a really, really successful womanizer until I got sick of it. Its difficult, but try to accept it. We were texting for awhile , then all of a sudden he just stopped talking and ignored me at work. Thank you so much for this advice! So will he ever text me? A woman did to me, what that guy is doing to you! I shouldnt initiate the text messaging right? Anyway, I texted him after 3 hours to say, hey, papi, sorry I missed you, I was here for 3 hours but gotta head out. He called right away and said that maybe we could grab something to eat that night (I think his intentions were good but he cant always commit b/c of work). We flirt a little bit here and there and have great chemistry but nothing had every made me think he liked me in that way until the other day when i had a little gathering at my house and he came we had a few drinks and at the end of the night he left with his friends but forgot his jacket and keys and had to come back. It doesnt take much to send a quick, how are you, thinking of you, missing you, hope youre okay, etc. He commented that if I was saying that I wanted to hang out and I was not sure what to reply but ended up saying that I would not mind hanging out someday if he would like to. Here here *slams down gavel*, what this chap said. Hey dude I appreciate that. so anyway have a lovely night its been 8 days since and i still havent heard from him and before i was playing it cool but now im starting to get worried. I had my man vanish on me too. The beginning stages of a relationship are best served as icing on the cake rather than the cake itself. Peace. Damn. Its sunday now and I have yet to hear from him. He only contacts me the day he wants to hang out, which is like once every 2-3 weeks. Or, yes of course, he might not be all that into you in the first place and be fading away. I know sometimes people can do things because they know it bugs you and people can not be very responsive. Hes playing stupid games or hes emotionally damaged. Again its only been a couple of months. So this girl would always wait anywhere between a full two days to respond to my texts and never respond to the questions I asked. Glad it helped you. That was yesterday at 5 pm and its been 24 hrs with no reply!! I dont want to move on with someone else prematurely. And believe it or not, I had a guy send me virtually this same question in hopes that I would discuss it at a speaking engagement. This makes me so sad I feel like giving up on love completely, I think its better to spare myself the pain, it hurts too much. The reason why I was doing a search on this subject was to honestly get some validation! It totally helped me. This article was a huge help, and Im feeling more confident about my situation. Ive dated guys like this. Is she just busy or is it me having issues and just let it go? Thank you!!!!! Its one thing if I text you on a Monday morning and dont hear back from you until the end of the work dayor even not until the next day because you were super busy. You dont need an article online to tell you that. I have been taking it an my life is so much less painful now. Babye. I been dated with this guy for several times and went for honeymoon last month. I have spent the night at his house and we have fooled around but no sex. Although your questions may be intended to get to know him better, he might not get the intention. He Was Playing You It doesnt work that way. When are you going to be free? As with most things in life, there are valid reasons why he might act this way. But yep, hed only hit me up when he wanted to use me, oh my, you have made my day. he said yeah many people lack those characteristics. For the past week we have only sent about 40 messages to eachother compared to the 800 we used to send per day!! Cant tell you how much this helped me to understand things. Even though, I like him a lot, I was getting nervous about the pace. I apologized for the mistake, explained what happened and I havent heard from him since. He went a bit quiet last weekend (i.e. I wasted 3 mos on the exact same type of guy. Theres this guy i like who im really attracted to suddenly just stopped texting me 2 days ago. Before, not getting a return text can be annoying, nonetheless, as suggested having your own FUN AND FULFILLING LIFE totally fills the void : ). Anyone who doesnt text for days is just being an ass! I did warn him of one thing: I like to text. * he voluntarily ran game on me and told me that I was the only one he was seeing, Glad, i found this web page, i need your help, I met a guy online we talk/text we connected alot i felt he like me and i was getting to like him too, we never saw each other face to face however we saw each other pics after several weeks talking which everything was going okay , he just started to be distance not calling or texting after several days i asking if everything is okay he said he been really busy with work.. well i try several times to text he reply but really short so i stop well yesterday i send him a text telling him that i see is not putting the same effort that he was really distance that i like him and i would like to move forward if he allow me, that i did not wanted to waste my time with somebody that was not into me that i hope he would understand. Just my opinion but i think its part of a personal growth moment in our lives, when we get that intense surge and our brains go aww and it all gets fuzzy cause someone comes along that seems to -just fit- and its awesome. I want to have a guys opinion my husband and i separated in march of last year and then we started talking again in may of that same year . I love writing articles to help people free themselves from suffering and have clarity in their love life. This article was very insightful and has helped me to comprehend many things and has especially helped me comprehend that I shouldnt blame myself for how the other person will react as long as I stay true to myself. He seemed eager to come. I annoyed him throughout the whole day. I also said that I wished him a good night and to take care. I dont date much because I am not good at playing this game that girls and guys play. If I text one of my friends and they dont respond right away, or even for days, it does not bother me one bit. However, I noticed that when I would run into him, he would turn away or walk the other way which I thought was strange but I just kept on saying hi, good night, or would just wave and he would reciprocate by doing the same. We initiated equal amounts of communication, he asked me out on all our dates but one, the last one, where I asked him if he wanted to hang out. It may feel like he is shutting down but he is really just figuring out his feelings. geesh. You will never be happy if you keep chasing him . I met a wonderful man over a month ago and we hit it off. I was just glad to know that he was nonchalant about the situation because it would have felt so awkward and uncomfortable for me because I pride myself in being a kind person and honestly, it would have felt horrible for me to run into him and have him look the other way because in reality nothing major happened between us. He will text i miss you and then disappear for months . I am not some lonely fool who is so desperate that I stick around with someone who ignores my messages. After a few weeks the texting eventually stopped and i found myself texting him . For whatever the reason I can tell you that at the end of the day its an illusion its a trap. Think about it? Nothing. I became very worried and to make a long story short I had to do some damage control lol. Might be because I feel if a guy really likes you, he would take some little effort to check on you not just to make plans with you. If your phone was constantly buzzing and you were in the middle of work, wouldnt you feel annoyed that the person couldnt just wait for 1 single reply instead of constantly trying to contact you over something thats probably not even important? Recently he was promoted to a position that requires a greater time commitment and although I would text him in the morning or afternoon I would hear back from him the next day and this has been continuing for over two weeks now. It is so time consuming and it seems like most guys now a days that is what they are focused on doing. Quick response: When someone asks me if they should worry, I tell them, No. This guy I meet about a month ago and I were texting non stop all day..hed make me smile all day and he said I made him smile. A New Mode, Inc. 2009-2023 All rights reserved. Its true that I showed my crazyness about him. Plain and simple: It is within moments of space where we are most able to connect with ourselves and the life within us. And the second you believe that, the guy has you he knows that youve conned yourself into believing that he holds the key to your happiness and he can very easily withhold and grant the access to that key to get you to do anything When I date a guy who is hearing with no problems my only means is texting since i CANNOT hear on the phone, therefore makes texting my main source of communicating electronically. I have a job to go to, classes to attend, other crazy people that I have to deal with as friends and co-workers- the last thing I need is some wacky love interest that keeps me guessing high and low does he like me or not? I need you help!!!!! and not text him Just because hes so BUSY? If a guy likes you, you will know it. Then 2 weeks after the first date he came over to my house and introduced himself to my family. We spent quite a few hours there. Change the perspective on how you're seeing the situation When a guy doesn't text you back, honestly, it's not him causing you the stress and the anxiety of waiting. We were like best friends, then we both admitted we liked each other after our date, but I dont get it. Even though we just started dating he didnt need to go radio silent on me. Guys like the chase. I decided i had enough and block him from texting but it is hurting me not knowing. He text last Wednesday saying hes been a bit porrly and hasnt answered me since. He got very angry but all ok now. When someone seems just slightly out of grasp, it can be an easy trap to fall into to want them to want us. He has so much stuff going on in his life I am going to take a back seat now and let him get on with it. Thank you so much for posting this. Thanks for the comments, Amber. You stop getting lost in emotions that dont help you and start clearly seeing the best way to respond to something (if the situation even warrants a response). 2. Maybe a week is too soon to be freaking out over his sudden silence. Whats worse is when you see theyve been online on their social media. We talked everyday since then. !in busy situtations he texted me he tht he ll b busy going smwhr,so dnt b tensd if he did,nt respons.means he cared me alot earlier.we nevr missed a single day to had a talk.even when he went abroad in merchant navy,thn after one month we started mailing each othr daily as i cn not talk on phone at home..he was very cared.but jbb se vo vapis aaye hai.tbb se thoda change ho gae haimeans baat to krte he..but sirf jbb mai text krti hoo.khud se vo text nahi krte.mai jbb puchti hoo.to vo kekhte hai k vo busy haito mai smj jati hoomai fir wait krti hoo k vo kbb free ho k baat krte haibut uske bad bhi vo khud msg nahi krte mujhe he msg krna padta hai..after smdays he told me that his x gf texting him and he answerd her not to text him as he has other gf in his life now.i said okk.its betr u block her if she texted u again n again,but he refused to block her. Why not think youre awesome and everyone wants yo be around you? And the FB thing, that behavior drove me nuts with the guy I dated last year, sometimes hed say he would call but didnt and yet Id see him on FB Everything is so electronic nowadays and this is straying off topic but I think its best to not friend a potential romantic interest on FB until you two are together And some couples decide to just never be friends on FB and that works too. ? struggle. He was really caring when I was at his place, we just met for past 2weeks. Its like I need constant reassurance that says yes Im still here and I still like you. What do you suggest I do about this thinking? Otherwise, there are times when I dont get a reply to a text. He would reply selectively to the questions posed to him. It has been 3 bourse and hes the type that is glued to his phone. Big mistake!!! This advice is for you. we met through a dating website. But when he hugged me I hugged him back. You cant read his mind or spy on him. It was reallysweet. They got defensive. It was probably a mistake. He was sick. I am really sad because I care so much for him, and am his friend and had faith he would be a MAN and just not play this game of hot and cold anymore we are just friends. It seems to be a frequent occurrence that overly available becomes boring quickly and this seems to be a classic case of this many guys (and girls) prefer the uavailable snob/jerk over the genuine alternative. hey eric, i must say its a blessing i stumbled across your site. unless you like being treated like crap? He did send me one message the other day telling me he loved me but that was all and I havent heard from him since. I assume the reason for your attractions cold-shouldering is as a result of the fact that they simply are not interested enough. I wont get into all the details but Im in a very very similar situation and was glad to read your post. do you think he is interested or not? That accounts for some of the guys, but not the majority the reality is that most guys, if theyre in a situation where youve made a number exchange have a spark of interest at least. He used to reply a few days later at times, now not at all. . Send him a quick flirty message, tell him a joke! 1 Send fewer texts to him. These aren't 100% and should be considered on a situational basis as the explanation could be a lot simpler than you're thinking.. GOD BLESS WHOEVER WROTE THIS ! The date went extremelyyy well and weve discussed hanging out in multiple instances. We feel that they must be lacking something to just supplicate themselves like that to us. We kissed, gone all the way actually, had some really great conversations since we have a lot in common. He sounded nice and genuine even though he doesnt text all that frequently. The more money I had freely given, the more hateful he became, I do understand why, but I dont like the negative things he would say to me, instead of appreciating me he became envious, he began to view me as a stupid sucker.
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